Hey, so I’m a cis pan male (he/him), out to my friends and family and pretty confident in being open with my sexuality around new crowds since Im lucky enough to live in a very progressive city.
However, since I fit the generic white guy mold in my appearance I get perceived as straight most off the time. What has made me feel kind of uncomfortable is that when I tell people I’m pan, half the time they don’t believe me, and always ask if I’ve hooked up/dated people other then cis women (which until recently I hadn’t)
This doesn’t just come from my cis straight friends/people but also from people in the lgbtq+ community and it really bugs me that since I don’t look the way they would describe a queer/pan/lgbtq+ person they think I’m lying or something?
It got to the point where I felt like I had to hook up with men and trans individuals just to prove that I was pan, instead of chatting to the most attracted person at the party/bar regardless of gender. Which didn’t feel great 😕
I guess I’m just curious if anyone else has had to deal with this? or am I just not confident in myself and letting people’s words get to me?
P.s. the whole “having to prove something” mentality has made it hard for me to ask most of my friends these questions so really glad I found this sub ❤️
Submitted May 20, 2020 at 09:28PM by MrDoubleyouHD https://ift.tt/2ZoZims
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